Not even water? Here’s how to wish your Muslim friends a meaningful Ramadan

Every year, right on cue, the question pops up.

“Wait… not even water?”

As Muslims around the world begin the holy month of Ramadan, WhatsApp groups light up, timelines fill with crescent moons, and office kitchens suddenly feel a little quieter during lunch hour.

In South Africa, Ramadan often overlaps with other sacred seasons, Christians observing Lent, the Chinese community celebrating the Lunar New Year, making this time of year feel especially reflective across cultures.

But if you’re not Muslim, you might be wondering: What do I actually say? And what’s the right way to say it?

Let’s start there.

What to say: Simple Ramadan greetings that go a long way

You really can’t go wrong with:

• Ramadan Mubarak – which means “Blessed Ramadan”

• Ramadan Kareem – which means “Generous Ramadan”

Both are widely used and warmly received.

If you want to go the extra mile, you can add something like:

“Wishing you a peaceful and meaningful Ramadan.”

Trust me, that little effort is appreciated. You might even score an invite to iftar, the sunset meal that breaks the fast complete with savouries, dates and, in many Cape Malay homes, a warm bowl of boeber when boeberaand rolls around.

And yes, before you ask again: not even water.

So… why do Muslims fast in the first place?

Fasting in Ramadan is one of the Five Pillars of Islam, a core, obligatory act of worship. That word “obligatory” can sound heavy. But for many Muslims, Ramadan is anything but a burden.

In fact, it’s the month they look forward to most.

Think of it less as a rulebook and more as a reset button.

From dawn to sunset, Muslims abstain from food, drink and sexual activity. But the deeper purpose isn’t about hunger. It’s about discipline, self-control and reconnecting with God.

In a world that constantly feeds our appetites, literally and metaphorically, Ramadan asks Muslims to pause. To sit with discomfort. To reflect.

Many will tell you: the stomach might complain, but the soul feels full.

What can’t Muslims do during the day?

From dawn to sunset, Muslims cannot:

• Eat

• Drink (yes, truly, not even water)

• Engage in sexual activity

Here in South Africa, that can mean fasting for more than 14 hours, often under a blazing African sun. So when you greet someone with “Ramadan Mubarak,” know that they’re navigating long, thirsty afternoons with quiet resilience.

But fasting isn’t just physical.

Muslims are also encouraged to fast with their character. That means avoiding:

• Gossip (no tea, no shade)

• Lying

• Fighting

• Hurtful behaviour

There’s a saying often shared during Ramadan: if you’re not improving your character, you’re just starving. And that defeats the purpose.

What do Muslims do more of during Ramadan?

A lot, actually.

Ramadan nights are alive. Mosques fill for extended prayers. Homes glow with late-night Qur’an recitation. Charity increases. People volunteer more. Some journal. Others reconnect with family they’ve drifted from.

There’s an intensity to the month, but also a softness.

In many South African communities, especially in the Western Cape and parts of KwaZulu-Natal and Gauteng, Ramadan becomes deeply communal. Neighbours exchange plates of food. Children run between houses before sunset. The smell of samoosas frying becomes a familiar evening signal that iftar is near.

It’s spiritual, but it’s also beautifully social.

Who actually has to fast?

Fasting is mandatory for healthy adult Muslims. But Islam places strong emphasis on mercy and practicality.

Those exempt include:

• The sick

• Travellers

• The elderly

• Pregnant women

• Breastfeeding women

• Women who are menstruating

Depending on the situation, missed fasts can be made up later or compensated for through charity.

So if you see someone Muslim not fasting, assume there’s a valid reason. No awkward interrogations required.

What about non-Muslims joining in?

In recent years, it’s become more common for non-Muslims to fast for a day in solidarity or curiosity.

It’s not a trend, Ramadan isn’t a cultural accessory. But when done respectfully, it’s often welcomed. It opens doors for conversation. For understanding. For shared humanity.

And honestly? There’s something powerful about sitting at a table at sunset, waiting for that first sip of water together.

Why your greeting matters

In a country as diverse as South Africa, small gestures go a long way.

When you say “Ramadan Mubarak,” you’re not just repeating a phrase. You’re acknowledging someone’s sacred time. You’re showing awareness. You’re bridging cultures in a world that desperately needs bridges.

So this year, when the question comes up, “Not even water?”, smile, ask respectfully, and follow it up with a warm wish.

Because at its heart, Ramadan is about discipline, yes. But it’s also about generosity. Community. Compassion.

And those are values anyone can appreciate.